The Songstress

oh I miss you most of all, my darling, when Autumn Leaves start to fall. 

Autumn Leaves (Fr. Les feuilles mortes), Joseph Kosma

*Sniff*.  Ahhh.

I realized today (funny I hadn't sooner), that I am incessantly singing. Singing in the car, singing to Ham-dog, singing while raking the autumn leaves…. It's understandable, seeing as I am a voice major, but there's something else.

I don't like listening. If I had my way, everyone would turn off the radio, the CDs, the TV, the background music. Turn off the Christmas songs in the shopping malls. I wish people enjoyed simplicity rather than (what I deem) cacophony. Familiar tunes center me, but new ones exhaust me. I dislike listening to New music … until it becomes Old music. Old music courses through me.

Hammer baby, a fifty-four convertible too…. light blue.

Santa Baby, Joan Javits

I don't know why I always sing to Hammer with "my" wish list. I also don't know how efficient a '54 convertible would be anyhow. Whenever I come back to the States, it always takes Hammer a few days to warm back up to me. Today was the day! He stuck his little head in my door, made a loop around, then left. I don't care how disgusting he smells; it was a kind and welcome gesture.

Hammer -> Ham-burger -> Ham-burglar -> Hammer-boogs -> Boogs.

There were bells, on the toll, and I never heard them ringing…

Till There Was You (from The Music Man), Meredith Willson

The past two days, I have been working diligently to try and get my (11mo) niece to trust me. Sometimes my singing succeeds in quelling her anxiety, and she seemed to enjoy The Music Man. I know these things can't be forced, and I'm taking it in stride. Now that I've studied developmental psychology, I know the awesome acronym for child-rearing: PRAISE

p- stands for something

r- respect… maybe?

a- don't even ask.

i- imitate.

s- hmm…

e- encourage?

well obviously that was something I retained. Regardless, I'd like to bring your attention to imitate. When interacting with Amelia, she started imitating the actions I was doing with her toys, and likewise, I would imitate her! Getting Amelia to warm up to me is actually happening!

What's This, Tita Sally, a Phone?

But I Can't Open It, Tita!

Um… Excuse Me?! I'm Texting Here.

In my second year, I had a wonderful Psyc tutor who gave me the opportunity to work in her lab- I won't tell you the exact purpose of the study (legally I can't), but I was looking at mother-child interactions in a play setting.

Sometimes, the mother would be so intent on proffering her own toy, that she fails to see what is actually interesting the child.

Sometimes, the mother is so eager to get the child to smile/laugh that she distresses the (previously contented) child.

Sometimes the mother "gets it right", and follows the child's gaze, comments on what is engaging the child, and shares interest with the child.

Funnily enough, that's how I think we ought to treat all relationships. I'm so sick of people arguing with one another because they are too forceful in their own way to properly consider the other's perspective. I'm sick of talking to people who are completely oblivious to the fact that I'm not at all interested in what they are talking about. I'm even more sick of people judging other races, sexes and social classes without consideration. Dear humanity, in order to "get it right", we really must be perceptive and responsive. 

Wow, maybe I did remember the "P" and the "R" from above. hehehe:)

In conclusion… I guess I am an advocate for listening after all. I'm not an advocate for listening to auto-tuned, altered, and refined music, but I do enjoy listening (and singing) live. I'm not in the mood to listen to people who constantly adorn facades, but I do enjoy listening to honest emotions and perspectives. Honesty is simplicity. We may not be perfect, but being honest is the best way to be ourselves.